I didn't sleep well last night however, I feel actually five times better then I did yesterday. I cleaned the Wii Room as we call it and I felt again like a part of this family. As well as rocking my baby, and putting her down to nap. Highlight of my day so far!!
I awoke last night and read a recommended blog. (Thanks Leslie) Something that I find myself doing a lot lately. I feel a strange connection with strangers and it makes me realize how amazing the women are, who battled this many years ago, without (my new friend) the internet!! This girl spoke a lot about being present, and it really fit with my new perspective. I wrote last time about letting go of control. And after my session of tears and anger that is exactly what I want to do. Granted it's difficult to teach a old dog new tricks, but it isn't impossible. There will be challenges day by day and I know that whatever is on the other side of that fence (as I mentioned in the last blog) isn't something that I can't handle. I am putting all my hope into being present in the day and relinquishing control. Wow that felt good!!!
She also spoke of her realizing that some vanity is o.k. ( I was worried about the vanity I sometimes feel) I means that you care about yourself enough to want the best. Trying to put the best into our bodies to energize and feed the cells appropriately so that they can work hard to fight for purity. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate!! Exercising to oxygenate the body so it is living in a healthy space, again to help the cells work hard. Praying to feed the spirit. Allowing one to release control, and trust in the process. I like this way of thinking. So if I can work on just being present in the day, and making sure I am feeding my mind, body and spirit. I will make it. Taking it day by day......
...Heather is coming to visit this weekend. Her sense of humor is definitely welcomed and needed here!!
....Bra shopping. Pretty excited about this. It's no V.S. but anything at this point sounds amazing.
...Next appointment with the Medical Oncologist to discuss my plan with chemo. is on the 28th, plenty of time to heal completely.
...and of course, getting a second opinion. Again Leslie, thank you.