Monday, April 28, 2014

CRAP..What a great word.

Today I am posting from my chemo chair. The nausea hit much quicker today and I needed a little something more to help and it made me kinda loopy. Thank goodness I had a ride.

(Day 5 of Treatment 3 )The whole process of this is taxing... and I want you all to know that I have moments too. I had my official meltdown today. Cried pretty much the whole day. Even watching Pitch Perfect to try and change my mood... cried during that. It is funny for those of you who haven't seen it. I don't know anyone who cried through it.

I think that most of it is because I don't want to do this anymore. I felt good before I had been diagnosed, I mean REALLY good. I was working out I felt the healthiest I have ever been. Even after my mastectomy, I felt great. I felt cured, and now I feel like crap...makes no sense. I know that tons of women have gone through this and survived but I hate it!! It feels CRAPPY!! I don't like feeling CRAPPY!  I feel o.k. today but I dread the last round of this AC crap!!

Then the Taxol? Really? 12 rounds of it.... Don't really know how it is going to feel, but they say there isn't any nausea with it. Thank goodness, because that is probably the worst feeling ever!! I can do tired...nausea... ick!

To Do this week:
1. Final book study luncheon
2. Book and Snack at Chaz's school
I can make it. I will make it, I just don't want too much to do this week because then that means I will be busy and that I will be one step closer to next Thursday....Not interested.

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